Helen’s fiancé and friends all know about her depression and offer as much moral support as they can.
‘But it’s really hard for my family to understand,’ admitted Helen. ‘I just can’t mingle and be a good host for a long time, and that’s going to be difficult for a lot of my family not to take personally.
‘The hardest part of depression is how numb you are to everything around you. I know I most likely won’t experience the full breadth of emotions of my wedding day, because I’m just not capable of feeling it all right now.’
Now that she’s on medication, Helen said she doesn’t feel as low as she used to six months ago. But she’s also not as happy as she once used to be.
Even when she tried on wedding dresses, she felt at her lowest. Thankfully her fiancé Skyler has been a massive support.
‘Having a partner to laugh with and give me support is the best thing that ever happened to me,’ she added.
‘My advice to other depressed folks planning their own weddings is this: None of the frills or extra bits is worth your health. Nothing is more important than you living to see your day.
‘I decided not to have a lot of things like cake and decorations and passed the responsibility of picking out flowers to my mum.
‘Focusing on the bond between you and your partner and the strength within yourself will help you arrive at your day in a better state.
‘You deserve a beautiful, joy-filled life, and that includes your wedding day. There is nothing worse than spending so much energy and happiness in the details, only to have nothing left when the day comes.
‘Invite people who give you strength and support, and don’t invite those who drain the life out of you (even if they are related to you).
‘Remember that we deserve love and joy, too. No matter what our broken brains try to tell us.’
The relationship between sleep and depression
Charity Mind says there’s a close relationship between sleep and mental health.
Living with a mental health problem can affect how well you sleep, and poor sleep can have a negative impact on your mental health.
Not sleeping or sleeping too much can be signs of depression.
The National Sleep Foundation says depression may cause sleep problems and sleep problems may cause or contribute to depressive disorders.
It also reports that people with insomnia have a ten-fold risk of developing depression compared with those who sleep well.
Many children and adults with depression also have sleep problems such as insomnia or hypersomnia (excessive sleepiness) or both.
According to recent research, children with depression who suffer from both insomnia and hypersomnia are more likely to have severe and longer-lasting depression.
Treatment for depression typically involves a combination of psychotherapy (including cognitive-behavioural therapy) and/or drug) treatment.
Each of these therapies may be used to treat both depression and insomnia and treatment for sleep problems is often an important part of depression therapy.
MORE: ‘I had months of anxiety dreams’: How to manage insomnia when you’re planning a wedding
MORE: Planning your wedding when you have depression: how I made it work
MORE: Lean On Me: My friend’s depression is becoming too much to bear
The daily lifestyle email from Metro.co.uk.
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